I thought I wasn’t going to blog this week. Between my full-time job, music and my novel, I’ve actually gotten some work done. So I was going to give myself a pass this week. Even when I carved my finger open while slicing ham on Tuesday morning, I thought I wouldn’t blog. With the whole Eric Garner case and the ridiculous decision not to indict, I had reason but still thought I wouldn’t blog because my feelings were pretty much the same as my last post.
Then one of my co-workers passed away. She and I were not friends outside of work, but at work we were cool. This woman liked to give and receive hugs, but could drive you mad with her efforts to control everything. Still, she was excellent at receiving feedback. You could tell her she was driving you crazy and she’d say she knows then make some attempt to reverse the damage. I admire that, particularly since I’m still working to achieve that trait for myself. She wouldn’t even hold it against you. If you frustrated each other but you came to her need a hug later in the day, she’d be there to give it to you without question.
Okay enough of this she. Her name was Pam. She was a real person and cancer took her away. It started as breast, then it included spine, brain, and liver. As I watch the office mourn her passing, I think to myself that this is what we are supposed to do. There is enough disease to take home everyone who’s time it is to go. There’s no need for anyone to take the life of someone else. I just don’t get why humanity takes it upon ourselves to violate each other. We steal from each other, curse each other, strive to overpower each other, and kill each other. Families shouldn’t have to mourn the passing of someone who was killed, particularly by the folks who were sworn to protect. How dare you think anyone’s life is less important than your own! And for those taking innocent lives, how genuine could your mourning be? How can you mourn the life of one taken by a disease then turn around and pull your gun on an unarmed child or choke a man past the point of his admission of fleeing breath?
I’ve seen and heard debates about the issues in our community being a race issue or a sin issue. I don’t think they are mutually exclusive. I think both issues exist, but I think what it boils down to is a love issue. We don’t want to give it. We don’t want to respect each other.
Pam liked to hug and was able to separate your desire to be loved from whatever words you spewed. My hope is for the Pam the world lost, several hundred more are coming up. Because that kind of love may just save us.